Mistaken God: Get Your Story Straight

It's a terrible feeling knowing that who you are is not enough for someone, that part of you is unacceptable, undesirable, rejected. What's worse is knowing that you have been misunderstood because you were misrepresented, lied about, your name slandered.I'll tell you one thing, if you decide to spread rumors about someone I love, I will be knocking on your door. My feathers get all ruffled just thinking about it. So just don't.Recently someone introduced my boys to the music of a well-known rapper. So I did the wise mama thing. I Googled. I read lyrics, watched music videos, and read interviews. This quote got my attention. "There are only two things I think about when I create. God and Jesus."After reading his "explicit" lyrics (labeled as such), watched music videos with mostly naked women, and read his tweets degrading women, I wanted to go knock on his door. I'm not sure where he's getting his thoughts about God and Jesus.He used the name of Jesus or else he doesn't actually know Him. He claims to love God and says that his music and life are inspired by God, yet his message goes against the very character of God.I will tell you right now that God does not NEED me to defend his name. He is perfectly capable of doing that himself, yet my blood boils. I'm angry. I want to yell at this rapper, "get off the fence! Don't you dare put the name of Jesus in a song filled with filthy language and your arrogance to suggest that you are a god too!"This rapper is not the only one to try and make Jesus something that fits into their agenda. I hear people every day say, " I believe God is....that's who he is to me."God is who HE says he is, not who we want him to be. I recently began reading through the Old Testament and honestly I have struggled to reconcile my beliefs of God as compassionate and full of grace with the stories of annihilation I'm reading.God is mysterious and he is sovereign. This is his deal, his creation and he can do what he pleases. I believe that. Yet, I question him and ask him, "Why?" In my mind, there was a better way. Even in my prayers, when he doesn't answer the way I think would be best, I question.The truth is that God is full of grace but he is also just. He is good but he is also dangerous. I am learning that I have been unbalanced in my reading of his Word. The sweetness of the sacrifice of Jesus for my sins is much sweeter after reading chapter upon chapter of the sacrificial system required by God before Jesus. Rule upon rule. It was all on man's shoulders, then Jesus took it all upon his own, and said, "It is finished."God is who he says he is. We take him for who he is, love all of him or he describes us as "neither hot nor cold. You are lukewarm. I will spit you out of my mouth." (Revelation 3:16)Don't you want to be accepted and loved for who you are?I remember being in college and kinda interested in a guy, and I thought he was interested in me as well. Later a friend told me that he liked me but I was too outgoing, too much of a leader for him. I knew that one day someone would love that very thing about me. I didn't want to marry someone who didn't accept all of me.Taking only parts of God's word to believe and follow is very convenient to support our own agenda for life. It may be easier to ignore the wrath of God because it frightens us, but it is part of who God is. I am getting to know God in a new way, reading chapters that I don't understand, that even scare me.The whole of scripture teaches us the character of God. When I find myself looking at a mysterious part of God, I hang on to the truths he has already made clear to me. He is good. He is faithful, even when I am not. He gave up what was most precious to Him so that I could be reconciled to him. He loves me and wants me.I loved to watch my oldest son run the 800 meter run at track meets. It was magical to me to watch him set his pace, know his opponents and then let it all out at the end, reeling in runner after runner until he crossed the finish line first. Often. I found myself disappointed this year when he decided not to run as a senior because it was stressful to him. I had this dream of him setting the school record and having his name on the plaque and me crying at the awards banquet.But that wasn't my son's dream.I am learning to let go of who I want my kids to be and embrace who they are and who they are becoming. As I read God's Word I am learning to do the same with Him. He cannot and will not be contained in my little box of rainbows and happy endings. He's way bigger than that.God is exactly who He says he is. Don't let anyone convince you otherwise. When we find ourselves confused and wondering about this mysterious Creator, when we are confronted by a world who wants God to fit into their agenda, we simply need to go back to the Word. Everything he wants us to know about him is there. Our wonderings and questions not answered there will be answered in his presence one day. Until then, we trust the God who loved us so much that he gave His Son for us.For the rapper who can't seem to sort it out, who calls himself a god and who's lyrics say "I just talked to Jesus...", the God you really want, the God who has your best interest at heart and knows that elevating yourself will only leave you empty, these are his words to all of us:But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.” 1 Peter 1:15-16Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.  Ephesians 4:29Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 1 Peter 5:6 and whoever wants to be first must be your slave— ²⁸ just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many. Matthew 20:27-28