Marianna Soper

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Stuck

Have you ever gotten your car stuck in mud? At first you just can't figure out why your car isn't moving, and then before you know it you have dug a deep hole with your spinning tires. Your car is covered with mud and you feel stupid. You feel stupid because you should have seen it coming. Now you're stuck and have to ask for help, and you feel certain that whoever helps you will agree that you are stupid.I am feeling stuck and stupid.I'm in a rut. Deep grooves in my road. I don't want to go in this direction. At all. Yet, the hard work of getting unstuck seems unpleasant too. I sound like a whiner. I know. Add it to the list. Stuck. Stupid. Whiner. I'm owning it. You're so glad that you decided to read my blog, aren't you? I'm glad that I could inspire you today. I've been honest about this writing thing with you before. When I sit down at my laptop, it's time for God to work something out in my heart and mind, and this is how we roll. You're here along for the ride."How to Get Unstuck 101". I think I've already taken this class and it was hard. The thing that I learned was that bad patterns or ruts are so easily made. Creating a good groove is not as easy, and staying in it is even tougher. Why is that? Why is it easier to get stuck in bad habits? Why aren't good, healthy patterns as easy to establish?Flesh. Our stupid flesh. God's still working things out in us and our flesh wants its way. The easy way. Always the easy way. The lazy way, the "feel good" way. We know good and well that we reap what we sow, but if we are not diligent about what our hearts' true desire is, the flesh settles for false desires. We find ourselves coasting down Easy Street making ourselves miserable as we go.Here's what I've been up to lately. (Remember that whole post on keeping promises to ourselves? Apparently, I have forgotten) I am stuck in an unhealthy rut. A mud hole that, If I'm not careful, will get deeper and deeper as I continue to spin my wheels.I am NOT drinking water, eating junk, and not exercising. I feel lousy. Really. Coffee comes from a bean, but I can't keep counting it as my vegetable and certainly not as a whole meal. Walking to my car from my classroom is the extent of my exercise. If you have never experienced the mental health benefits that come from regular exercise, then you should. Without it, I am an irritable, tangled ball of stress.YET, I have been unable to find the resolve to turn it around. The lure of immediate comfort is strong.My flesh isn't the only enemy I have right now. The enemy continually whispers in my ear, "you don't have time. You have work to do."Between my flesh and the enemy's lies, I have allowed myself to become stuck in unhealthy patterns. How can I get back on track?It's simple, really. I only need to answer a few questions first."Am I living how I want to live?" I have to ask myself that question."What will my life look like this time next year if I don't make changes now?" Another great question."Who will take care of me right now?"  I can tell you  that my family, my boss, not even my mother is not going to take on that roll.If I can answer these questions tonight and choose my heart's true desire for my life instead of comfort, then I am one step closer to getting out of the mud. Trying to make myself feel better about the hard stuff in life, by eating what comforts and telling myself there is no time to exercise is not working.I hope you're not stuck too. If you are tonight, ask yourself those questions. Be honest and take a step with me toward a new groove.Because the Sovereign LORD helps me, I will not be disgraced. Therefore have I set my face like flint, and I know I will not be put to shame.  Isaiah 50:7