Marianna Soper

View Original

Lost My Groove

I've moved several times, and each time I find myself in new territory, I feel a little insecure. New grocery store, new doctors and dentists, neighbors and friends...It takes a while to re-create your life in a new setting. There is an element of discomfort as you find your new "normal". You look around at the locals and feel out of place, asking directions, making wrong turns, getting strange looks as you speak with an accent. Very possible to just feel like a freak until ...you find your groove.One day you wake up and feel at home. It's a beautifully comfortable feeling. You have become yourself all over again in a new place- no longer a stranger in a foreign land. You can give a lost traveler directions and recommend a great pediatrician. You have a favorite coffee shop and don't feel weird asking your neighbor for butter.I've lived in the same town for nine years, a record for our family. One year ago, however, I stepped into new territory- Working Mom Land. I will just go ahead and tell you that I have NOT found my groove.I am still asking for directions, making wrong turns, and getting lost.Today was especially difficult and I questioned it all. Ever been there? You are in a new place, new job, new relationship, or new ministry, and you think to yourself, "what in the world was I thinking?" It's more than you can handle and going back "home" seems awfully tempting.Today I felt like I was doing so much that I could not do anything well. I began to miss home- Stay at Home Mom Land.Looking back I could see God's hand providing me with a job. A great job. Yet, I felt lost and unqualified. So, what did I do?I prayed. I found a quiet place tonight and prayed. I asked for help. I asked for clarity and wisdom. God still does that. He still gives to those who ask, he still encourages those who are floundering, and he still provides for those in need. He loves us and never asked us to live this life alone.As I was leaving my quiet place, the radio in our car was playing that song "I am Not Alone" by Kari Jobe. God still speaks to us, whispering his love to our hearts. We are not alone, whatever land we are traveling through. I am believing that He will help me. One day, I will wake up and feel at home in my new roll.Do you need help? Just ask. You are not alone.Jesus invites us to come to him.28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28